Struggle
by oneechan-netta
Summary: After all he put her through, she still couldn't stop thinking of him... still couldn't stop... feeling ... for him. A story full of trials and innocence, of revelations and tears. A kagsess and mirsan.


Hi! Please no flamez! Just… criticism… nice… criticism…. lol

Warning: Some lime content… kinda. And I'm sorry Sesshomaru's name is spelled wrong ya'll. I'll fix it next time but I'm kinda tired. 

Disclaimer: I do not own the godly sexy Sesshoumaru or Kagome or any other characters from Inuyasha.

Chapter one

I can get through this.

I will get through this just to see the look on his face. Ugh! Him. How I despise him. I slipped through the mud and collided painfully into the ground but immediately picked myself up again and spat out the mud that had gotten in my mouth.

I ignored the yelling around me as I reached for the rope to climb. It was rough and slippery in my grasp and I could feel the blisters forming. The rain pounded steadily on my back. Pounding relentlessly at me. Almost taunting me as he had done. I winced at the thought that my hands were now marred but suppressed it quickly. I will not give in to that .

Weird that after all that had happened I could think of only him…

Flashback

"Kagome-Chan wake up already!" Sango shook her roughly for what, she was positive, was the fiftieth time. An evil smirk appeared on her face and she got up quickly and excited the door. I opened one eye slightly to see if she was still there when I heard her footsteps. Good she's gone. I opened my eyes fully to the irritating sunshine. Why did she have to leave the curtains open? Dang! With a rustle and a moan I turned and tried to find some shadowy places to put my eyes in so I could get some more sleep. That's when I saw the alarm clock.

"Aieeeee! Sango why didn't you tell me! I'm no WE are going to be late!" I jerked up in my bed and searched wildly. What to wear what to wear? Suddenly I heard running footsteps and looked towards the door.

"Look Kagome, at least you didn't have to take a shower ne?" Resist the smile, resist the smile. Sango was grinning impishly towards me as I huffed in pretended annoyance.

"Well, it's all your fault anyway." I felt my mouth drop as I looked at her.

"No! Look at the road!" I paid no heed and continued to look at her in disbelief. My fault! How the fudge could it be my fault! Sango quickly took the car wheel and tried to dodge the oncoming traffic. Humph! My fault indeed. Just like it was going to be her fault we crash.

"Okay okay. I know how long you can keep a grudge. Fine it wasn't your fault… entirely." I knew that was all I would get from her so I took hold of the car wheel again. I heard Sango's sigh of relief and gave an evil smirk of my own.

"What are you doing! No! Ah! You know if the police catch you you'll get a ticket and that'll be the 9th one! Then I'll have to drive!" (AN: don't noe if it's really true… I think it is on military bases in Japan though…) I knew the really reason why she was freaking. She hated it when I went this fast. Hated the blur of cars and trees, people and buildings. I thought it was exhilarating. But that's just me it seems. I sighed as I saw her clutching the seat as if it were a lifeline. Revenge just doesn't do it for me. I slowed down and threw Sango a bright smile.

"Don't worry, were almost there Sango-Chan!"

The alley was dark and the same as any other alley. Why did they pick this one then? I sighed. Even youkai can be unimaginative. I scoffed at the youkai I had been following for the past hour. How could he even call himself a full-blooded youkai? Might as well be a half-breed, that's how useful he was. He stood in the middle of the alley, waiting for someone.  
I took the time to look at the surroundings. Trash littered the streets on both sides leaving a narrow strip of land in its wake. The smell was… uncomfortable but I would not complain. Lord Sesshoumaru never complains. The cat and mice had already scurried hearing our approach. Or feeling my approach and hearing his. Truly such an unskilled youkai should be killed. But he would be in due time.

Finally I heard shuffling footsteps coming towards us. I looked up to see a figure shrouded in cloaks and rags. They were whispering but I could hear them as if they were yelling in my ear.

"Has the new one made it?" her cloak rustled with every movement. Damn! If I could just get her face I'd remember it till she died, which would have been so much sooner. I sniffed the air delicately to try to get her scent but the cloaks put such a strong smell and so many I could not sort through them all.

"No." 

"Damn that girl! Have you found out more about this… Kagome Higurashi?"

"No."

"Such uselessness. If you do not prove yourself useful soon I will have to make you into entertainment." He could feel the fear radiating off of the youkai he had been following. Hmmm. I wonder what this person does to elicit such fear. Kagome Higurashi… I will find her and see why she is so important.

"Has he left Kagura?"

"Yes Naraku." There voices had returned to normal as they said this. An evil laugh rang through the alley. It would have reached Sesshoumaru if a sound barrier hadn't been erected as soon as he left.

"This is a win-win plan. That Kagome is certainly formidable, every youkai we send disintegrates when he reaches the vicinity of her home or any building she's in. Either Sesshoumaru dies when he tries to get to her or he kills her when he does."

"How do you know he'll try to kill her?"

"This girl is impudent and does not know the custom of youkai as many people should. I do not know if it stems from ignorance or something else but she will pay for the insult she has done me. I know that her behavior will bring out the worse in Sesshoumaru."

"Kagome! Let me do that for you!"

"No Kagome let me!" The crowd of coworkers at the Shrine restaurant had grown. I stood helplessly in front of them. Why did they do this? They were really nice boys and all but a lot of them got fired the first day because of this.

"Please guys, don't get fired on account of me. I can do my own work just fine! Help Sango over there." I wondered why they were swaying when I began to talk. In my romance novels I think it would be called swooning. Of course it wasn't swooning! No one swoons in real life! These boys were just restless. I pointed towards Sango who was being followed by Miroku. 

I knew she liked him the first time she saw him and I think it's vice versa too, if only he hadn't groped her on the first day. They made such a cute couple. I mentally put an x on the picture of Sango and Miroku together. The boys all looked at Sango with… something in their eyes. Jealousy for Sango? Maybe I'll try to get her hooked up with one of these guys. But before I could pick someone suitable they started making their way to the pair.

"Sango lives with Kagome."

"They live together!"

"Kagome is so wonderful, so sweet, so giving to ask us to help someone else instead!" I blushed at the person's words. If only they knew how I could get they wouldn't be talking like that.

Sango and Miroku looked at the crowd of boys slowly walking towards them as if they didn't want to leave Kagome's presence. That was probably the case anyway.

"She really is clueless isn't she?" Miroku couldn't hide the incredulous tone in his voice.

"Yup, she really doesn't know. I've tried to tell her a few times but she insists that that stuff only happens in romance novels and fairy tales. She doesn't believe in love for herself for some reason." Unbeknownst to Kagome, Miroku and Sango had gotten close during the time Miroku spent trying to grope her. Sango felt as if he was an old friend. "She was abandoned by her parents and I think she thinks no one will ever love her." Sango sighed with unhappiness. Suddenly she was enveloped in a hug.

"There there Sango. Everything will be alrig…"

"HENTAI!" She slapped him lightly. She knew he could have groped at more inappropriate spots but he had just brushed her breast instead. She could feel the tingles resonate through her; his touch on her body was like plucking a chord on an instrument. He had plucked the right chord and it felt… perfect. He grinned at her and suddenly took her hand. It was as if the world had slowed down just for them as he brought her hand to his lips. His lips… her eyes became fixated on them.

"Kagome said to help you!"

"We obey Kagome!"

"We'll give her our lives gladly!" Sango jumped guiltily and averted her eyes from Miroku's lips. Not before she could see the sexy smile gracing them. She pulled gently on her hand to get it out of his grasp and turned towards the crowd of boys with a red tinge on her cheeks.

"You sweep the floor. You wash the dishes. You serve the tables. You guys cook. You take the trash." As Sango talked Miroku looked at her discreetly. Sure Kagome was the epitome of beauty but Miroku, surprisingly, didn't think he could handle that. Sango on the other hand was just what he needed. She was so fiery but kind, strong but gentle. And she was definitely sexy. He watched her sway her hips to the beat of the radio and had to fight down his immediate arousal. He had seen her eyes widen as he touched her breast. Could almost feel the tingles go through them both. He hadn't meant to touch it but he had. It was just so tempting and… there.

He had expected the hard punch not her light slap. It was almost a caress. The images that came to his mind burned him. Her caressing him, him caressing her, their bodies slick with sweat rubbing on each other with her moans permeating the air.

"Miroku… Miroku!" Gosh, what could he be thinking about? I mean he has been standing here for about five minutes looking off in one direction. I tried to see who he was looking at but all I saw was Sango. I shrugged mentally. Whatever. I poked him and wondered at the heat radiating off of him.

"Miroku are you okay?"

"Hmmmm?" he answered dreamily. He still wasn't paying attention to me! I poked him harder, still ignoring the heat coming off of him. He jerked his head towards me and gave me a sheepish smile.

"Yes Kagome?"

"Finally! What would you like to order? On the house." I don't know what Sango's doing giving him a house order. It comes out of one of her free orders! I gave another mental shrug. Oh! I love doing those. I giggled quietly.

"Kagome? Hey…"

"Oh. Sorry." I laughed nervously as I realized I had zoned off again. I wrote down his order and gave it to one of the cooks with a smile. I turned to walk away but I heard a thump as he hit the ground.

"Ummm…"

"He slipped Kagome." Was Miroku laughing? Why! That guy was hurt! I rushed to the fallen person and asked if he was okay.

"I'm Hojo." He blurted out. Oookaayy. I asked if he was okay, not for his name. Maybe he has a concussion? I felt his forehead and it was as hot as Miroku had been! Wow, a fever must be going around.

"Are you okay? You feel a little feverish." I watched as he opened and closed his mouth like a drowning fish. Wait… have I ever seen a drowning fish? Then where did that come from? Maybe I've seen one on TV? I felt someone poking me in the side. My eye began to twitch with annoyance.

"Sango stop! You know that annoys me!" It was weird that this one spot on my hip was very… sensitive. I get annoyed if people touch me there. People, meaning Sango, since no one else has touched me there. I felt her poking me again and growled. The boys looked on in amazement as the beauty in front of them turned dangerous. Her raven black hair seemed to be standing on end and she was emitting sounds from her throat that didn't exactly sound human. They almost feared for this Sango girl but she just crouched there beside Kagome impassively, continuously poking her until…

"Okay! I'm done, no more zoning!" It was Sango's way of telling me I wasn't paying attention again. I tend to zone when I talk to boys, even if I'm the one that started the conversation. Miroku had taken a step forward when I had growled while everyone had taken a step back including that… one dude. Maybe he does like her after all! I beamed up at him and he blinked at my mood change.

"Hey, Miroku! Wanna come over this weekend and spend some time with me and Sango!" Why were the boys groaning like that? I turned my attention back to a glaring Sango. I stuck my tongue at her childishly and grinned up at Miroku.

"I would love that!" Miroku was practically beaming at the two on the ground.

"But you have to watch all the movies we watch!" Miroku groaned inwardly but nodded, the smile still plastered on his face.

"Kagome! What are you doing!" Sango hissed. She turned towards Miroku's retreating back and felt a wave of heat go through her as her eyes settled on his but. She registered the poking that was happening to her face and turned towards Kagome again.

"Oh, your back. What were you staring at? All I see if Miroku there." Sango shook her head at her sister's ignorance.

"Why did you do that! Don't give me that innocent smile and yes you know what I'm talking about!" Sango already knew Kagome's routine and she answered the remarks she already knew were to come. Kagome's smile dimmed and her mouth shut. Should she tell Sango? Why not!

"Well you see. You know how usually boys step back when I growl like I did earlier?" I waited for her response patiently. If I had to tell her I might as well bug her first. She nodded impatiently and I waited till her head had nodded up and down for at least twenty times before continuing.

"Well he took a step forward to protect you and now I think you two should go out!" Sango hid her disbelief. No one had ever stepped towards Kagome while she was growling. It was just too shocking and scary because Kagome was so sweet and innocent and pure that you wouldn't expect such ferocity in her. Sango knew she was in for it now. Before, when Miroku was following her and Kagome saw that she didn't like him, Kagome didn't play matchmaker. But now… Sango knew Miroku was probably going to be showing around the house at the most awkward of situations. And knowing Miroku he would take full advantage of such situations and Kagome would do nothing now that Miroku was good enough for Sango in her eyes. She readied herself mentally for the months to come.

On the plus side Sango still couldn't believe Miroku had stepped forward! Maybe there is something special between us after all. And now that Kagome has accepted Miroku they would probably be inseparable. So how come that didn't sound so bad?

"You're going to have to come and get it Miroku!" I don't think I've seen Sango have so much fun with a guy before. I watched as she was chased shrieking around the house. When they got to the living room he tackled her on the couch and nuzzled her neck. Yup, I'm good. I went back to the movies. What to watch first… Underworld? Darkness Falls? Gothika? Yup, Gothika I decided when I built the mental image of Sango in Miroku's lap. She was very, what's the word… shy, during scary movies. This would be perfect.

"Okay, lets watch Gothika first!" I sat on the recliner with my droopy doggy and pushed play as they got settled onto the couch. I sighed at the adorable picture they made then returned my attention back to the movie. I fell asleep before it even started.

"Hey, Sango pause the movie." Miroku whispered into my ear and I shivered slightly. I could feel the smile on his lips against my ear as he bit my lobe gently.

"Sango…" he whispered.

"Y-Yes?" my breath was a little high and uneven.

"Let's bring Kagome upstairs now." I nodded as I saw my friend sleeping with her droopy dog. I smiled at her innocent figure. She was so kind and caring. My eye twitched as I tried to get her droopy dog out of her grasp but she clung to it tenaciously. Miroku nodded in understanding and picked girl and dog and carried them upstairs. I waited for him on the couch thinking how sweet he was.

"Boo." I almost jumped out of my skin as he whisper-said it in my ear. How does he know that's one of my sensitive spots?

He pushed play and the movie started, as we both got comfortable once more. I laid my head in his lap while he stroked my hair soothingly. I buried my head instinctively in his lap every time something popped out or something was scary. I could feel him tensing each time but I couldn't help it. Kagome probably picked this movie because she knew I'd do this. At the ending it was especially scary and I couldn't help but utter a tiny scream as I buried my head against him once more.

Miroku could feel her open mouth against his leg and the hot air rush out as she uttered a little scream. His hands even further in the couch as he resisted the urge to buck his hips up so she could feel his arousal. This whole movie was torture as he stared unseeingly at the TV screen every time she buried her face against him. He didn't know if he could have taken it any longer if the movie had lasted even one minute.

"Is it over?" Sango's voice rose from his crotch. He groaned long and hard at the feel of her.

Oh my god! He just groaned. Did I affect him that much? I mean, my old boyfriends didn't seem to mind when I did this but they've never responded to me so… readily. I could feel an answering heat rise in me as I finally registered how hot he was. It was a throbbing, pulsating heat that called out to me and I liquefied in response.

"Sango." Miroku's whisper was harsh and raspy but he didn't care.

"Can I kiss you?" he waited patiently, confident in her response to him. She raised her head up and got up, sitting on the couch now. She leaned forward slightly and raised her lips to his. He dipped down and lightly pressed his lips to hers.

They sighed in mutual satisfaction as the kiss became soft and tender, just a touch of the lips, despite the inferno raging in both their bodies, just a touch of their souls. And they drew back, dazed in each other and hopelessly in love.

"I must be… going now," Miroku said haltingly. He didn't want to leave, but if he stayed any longer that kiss would take a different turn. He saw disappointment flash in her eyes and pressed a finger to her lips to stop her protest.

"I will not ruin what we're starting by with you on our first date. This is too important to me." He saw her eyes soften and pressed his lips to hers again. This time he couldn't resist the light flick of his tongue. Couldn't resist the moan that came from her, involuntarily giving him an opening. Just one taste he told himself as he plunged his hands into her hair and dove deep. But he couldn't stop as he dived, touched, explored the recesses of her mouth. And when they finally drew up for air all he could do was sigh. He got up shakily, not trusting his legs anymore after that, and walked slowly towards the door. Sango lay there dazed for the second time that night as she heard his soft goodbye and the door close.

Upstairs

Sesshoumaru perched on her windowsill watching her in fascination. She was beautiful. Utterly breathtaking, is that why they wanted her? He knew he wanted her. He could feel the heat already rising in his body. He silently opened the window and crept over to her bed. Her raven hair was spread haphazardly about her and her lips were full and luscious. Her nose was pert and perfect and her eyelashes were long and thick. He could barely make out her form beneath the blanket but that too looked enticing.

He decided to take a more careful examination of her body. She lay sleeping on her black, oblivious to the world in more ways than one.

He stood over her still form and slowly put his claws on both sides of her neck. He drew his claws over the sides of her body and almost shuddered as they dipped into her tiny waist, as they flared at her hips to dip again at her legs. Yes, her body was enticing. But it was human. He Sesshoumaru, Lord of the Western Lands till this day, had never had to lay with a human. He no longer thought of them as filthy beast but their smell… Her smell was, he sniffed the air attentively and his eyes widened in surprise. 

That had to be the most wonderful, he took another discreet sniff and then another, inhaling it, the most enticing intoxicating scent he had ever smelt. His eyes darkened with want and he wondered, for the first time in his demon years, if he should reconsider that no sex with humans thing. He didn't really mean that, filthy beast? Whoever said that? Though his eyes still darkened with lust, becoming the color of tarnished gold, he took a step back and gathered his bearings.

His face showed to be passive once more and he put up a sound barrier as he came to do what he needed to do. This girl needed to answer some questions of his.

Dream of Kagome

Hi! Long time no talk! So what are you doing here? Hmmm… still not answering I see.

You will answer his questions… I ask of you.

Oh, so you finally learned how to ask for things right! Good. What are you again?

The Shikon No Tama. I decided to ignore the exasperation in its voice.

What questions am I going to have to answer?

Do not try to weasel out of this my protector. You will answer all questions.

Who will I be answering them to?

You will see, and do not be alarmed. Though I doubt you will be. Now awake!

End dream of Kagome

I opened my eyes slowly but someone was already hovering over me. My mouth emitted a little shriek and my hand came up immediately to swat or slap whatever it was. As my vision cleared I gasped in surprise. He was the handsomest most gorgeous man I had ever met. His long white hair looked silky and his body… his body I could not see in the loose clothing. I sighed in disappointment. His eyes were to die for! But they were so dark. I think gold would have suited him better.

Sesshoumaru couldn't believe it. Her eyes were… brilliant. The shone at him with innocent interest and he wondered if what the dossier said was true.

Beginning of dossier

Kagome Higurashi: single, female, twenty.

Relationship with youkai world: none. Seems oblivious to our kind. Further investigations have led to nothing.

End of dossier

It was baffling really. Who doesn't know youkai. But she was seeing him, he was sure. He would be the first youkai she has ever met. Joy.

I looked at the strong hand that had grasped mine before I could hit him. His grip was strong but gentle. I blushed as I thought that I tried to hurt this guy. I didn't even know him!

"Gomen..." but he cut me off before I could say anything else

"You will answer this Sesshoumaru's questions wench." Wench! How dare he call me that.

"Listen here Sess, my name is KAGOME! Ka-go-me. Do I have to say it a little slower for you? Kaaagoooommmeeee." The grip on my arm got a little uncomfortable but I didn't care. His face showed nothing as he looked down at my figure.

"You will use this Sesshoumaru's name correctly, Kagome." The last bit he said hesitantly, as if he didn't want to give me the simple courtesy of saying my name. Oooohhh! This guy… hey what is he doing?

"What are you doing?" He was slowly pulling me up from the bed and I very much liked it down there.

"Questions can be asked later, right now I think I'll see if you taste as good as you smell." I panicked and started to struggle in his grasp but he held tight to me with incredible strength, not moving an inch.

"Why do you struggle, I saw the interest in your eyes when you woke. Why deny yourself?" Well, wasn't he arrogant. Deny myself of what! Did he mean… no! I mean, I know the mechanics of it but I've never…. My face turned red at the thought of doing that with this stranger.

"Ah… so you ARE an innocent. How rare. Well, I guess I have to show you what you're missing." He continued pulling me towards him till our bodies settled. I could feel the hard lines of his chest and his strong thigh muscles against mine. He rubbed something incredibly hot and hard against my core as he lifted me up so that we were aligned down… there. I could feel a wet heat pooling in my crotch and I didn't know what was going on. I pushed away suddenly and stepped back. He could see the confusion on my face.

"What is this… feeling of heat? I've never felt this before." He groaned at my words as I looked up at him. He took a step forward and I took a step back. No way was I going to let him near me after he made me feel that. Though it wasn't so unpleasant that I wouldn't want to… no Kagome focus! During my private monologue he had come closer and his face was two inches away from mine. I could feel the heat start again and I started to panic. Wait was this desire? This liquid fire racing through my body was desire wasn't it. Sango tried to tell me about it before but as she said you had to experience it to know what it is.

"This… this for you is desire… right?" He could no longer smell panic in her scent. Curiosity rose from her in waves. Curious is good he thought hazily. But she was still backing away. Every step he took she still took one step back. He backed her in to the wall and she stared up at him, a mixture of fear and that damn curiosity in her eyes. Her head fell back as he straddled her hips so she could feel the heat between my legs.

AN: um… I gotta go now! Lol. don't kill me plz! backs towards exit I'll try to update soon! Byz.


End file.
